Acceptance when you think of the definition is a pretty easy concept. "the action or concept of being received as adequate or suitable." When something is suitable you're okay with it... But what about when it's not? What about when it's something you are absolutely not okay with but you can't change it? What about those unsuitable situations that you have no choice but to bear down and swallow. Easier said than done right? I've learned the hard way, accepting things that are unsuitable--those are the real defining moments. I'm a stubborn person..if you know me you know that. I fight like hell--- about anything and everything. I don't easily come to terms with things and I do everything in my power to change them before convincing myself it's out of my control. Sometimes, my will to fight and prove people wrong for the expected "inadequate or unsuitable" situations is a positive thing and sometimes it devours every positive thought I'm capable of thinking. So many times I focus my energy and thoughts on things that need to be fixed, relationships that aren't working, people that don't want to talk to me. I change myself and contemplate a hundred times in my head what I need to do differently instead of realizing sometimes it's not me. And sometimes things just happen and how I react to those situations says more about me than I realize.
My inability to accept certain situations is what lead to my eating disorder. Instead of accepting, I changed. I could make things better if I was something else.. more this more that.. and when those things didn't work and I had lost myself in the process of changing; the only thing I could grasp was my weight and appearance. If I looked like I had my crap together well then certainly people would believe that I did. Let me say this, I am on the mend of my eating disorder and I go days without washing my hair. I 9 times out of 10 have coffee spilled down my workout clothes of choice for the day... I show up to things two days too early, sometimes two days too late. I am loud, I have no filter. I act on emotions..I get really mad, I cry over really stupid things, I laugh, but most importantly I chose to acknowledge and accept. Everything. The good, the bad, the ugly. I am a mixture of all three.
Clarity and peace came for me when I chose to no longer dwell on negative situations but acknowledge them... accept them and move on. Realize that sometimes glass shatters but when you frantically try to place all the pieces back together you only are going to hurt yourself. When you choose to focus on negative things you rid yourself of happiness, of being aware of the blessings that surround you. I so many times create much bigger problems by allowing negativity to fuel my fears. When I choose to accept things for what they are and realize that even in the midst of my mess I'm undeservingly blessed every part of life doesn't have to fit perfectly. Don't spin your wheels trying to make sense of things..some day it may come. I've wondered for years why me why this? Especially with my eating disorder..I can choose to ask a million questions, over think a million scenarios in my head, or I can choose to accept the experience and take my lessons and help someone else....which is what I've finally planned to do.
This life is full of good, bad, and ugly. Pick what you focus on wisely, dig deep and have faith. I have no control over what tomorrow holds, but I'm confident in who holds tomorrow, and you should be too.
xoxo
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:20
My inability to accept certain situations is what lead to my eating disorder. Instead of accepting, I changed. I could make things better if I was something else.. more this more that.. and when those things didn't work and I had lost myself in the process of changing; the only thing I could grasp was my weight and appearance. If I looked like I had my crap together well then certainly people would believe that I did. Let me say this, I am on the mend of my eating disorder and I go days without washing my hair. I 9 times out of 10 have coffee spilled down my workout clothes of choice for the day... I show up to things two days too early, sometimes two days too late. I am loud, I have no filter. I act on emotions..I get really mad, I cry over really stupid things, I laugh, but most importantly I chose to acknowledge and accept. Everything. The good, the bad, the ugly. I am a mixture of all three.
Clarity and peace came for me when I chose to no longer dwell on negative situations but acknowledge them... accept them and move on. Realize that sometimes glass shatters but when you frantically try to place all the pieces back together you only are going to hurt yourself. When you choose to focus on negative things you rid yourself of happiness, of being aware of the blessings that surround you. I so many times create much bigger problems by allowing negativity to fuel my fears. When I choose to accept things for what they are and realize that even in the midst of my mess I'm undeservingly blessed every part of life doesn't have to fit perfectly. Don't spin your wheels trying to make sense of things..some day it may come. I've wondered for years why me why this? Especially with my eating disorder..I can choose to ask a million questions, over think a million scenarios in my head, or I can choose to accept the experience and take my lessons and help someone else....which is what I've finally planned to do.
This life is full of good, bad, and ugly. Pick what you focus on wisely, dig deep and have faith. I have no control over what tomorrow holds, but I'm confident in who holds tomorrow, and you should be too.
xoxo
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:20